Guest Blog on Living My MoMent

I wrote a guest blog for Abbey Fatica while she was busy having a baby (congratulations!) and it just posted on her site for mom entrepreneurs.

Here’s an excerpt:

What I find most rewarding are the Penny Stones stories I get to hear. Customers have shared memorable conversations that were started by a Penny Stone. They have connected with their family on a deeper level. Or they found out something they never realized about a loved one. And whenever I hear those stories, I know that Penny Stones are helping people develop deeper relationships. It’s the most satisfying feeling! So, when someone asks me “Is it worth it?”, I say “Absolutely!”

Here’s the direct link:  http://livingmymoment.com/2009/12/is-it-worth-it-wtammy-from-cmd-gifts

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Facebook Comments – Treat them like a Billboard

Facebook Tip – before posting, assume comments you make on your wall or on a photo will be read by your boss, neighbor and mother. 

With the advent of Facebook, we can see and read about friends as well as strangers’ lives.  The way it’s currently set up, anyone can see photos and comments in photo albums of anyone they’re connected to and anyone those people are connected to.  I’ve clicked on a friend’s photo  in an update and ended up clicking through a photo album of a complete stranger. 

Here’s an example of some comments I found on a friend’s friend’s photo.   Unlike one woman thinks, they do not disappear into the archives.   

Mary
thats it, I’m never eating again thx to you skinny bitches!!!
1:10p.m.

Elaine
what are you talking about? I was going to start my diet today and then I remembered you baked me that cake. It was so GOOD
1:11pm

Mary
we may need to start getting photo approval of those in photo before posting, I’d like to request this one be deleted asap
1:56pm

Elaine
they disappear into the archives. How about Bernadette’s profile picture? I look scary in that photo
1:57pm 

Mary
tell her, I’m sure she’d understand & post another!
2:03pm  

Dan
OMG… Quit your fussing… You are all HOT! This pic was obviously taken early because you’re all sober… :)

If you want to see more comments that were written to be more private than public, check out Lamebook.

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Thanksgiving Tree II

Thanksgiving Tree 2009

Thanksgiving Tree on November 30, 2009

Here’s our Thanksgiving Tree, in all of it’s glory.  We had much to be thankful for this year!  See this link to the previous post about our Thanksgiving Tree.

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Maintaining Vs. Building Relationships

Building V. Maintaining Relationships final

I’ve been thinking a lot about relationships lately.  It may just be that time of year, but, for whatever reason, I’ve been thinking about the difference between how I communicate in this stage of my life versus when I was younger.  Today, as a wife and mom, I seem to talk more about the goings-on of everyday life – schedules, meals, appointments, and all that.  It’s more on the surface and the goal is to maintain the relationship and the activities we share.  When I was in high school and college, I/we talked more about values, opinions, preferences and the future.  Conversations were longer and were building, not just maintaining, relationships. 

I remember calling a few of our new neighbors after we had moved into our home in Ohio in 1998.  Each time, I expected to talk to the ladies like I did with my friends in California.  But each time, after a few minutes, I got the impression that if I wasn’t calling for a specific reason, the conversation was ending quickly.  They were busy and didn’t have time to chat on the phone.  So I adjusted my expectations and my phone calls. 

While maintaining a relationship is good and coordinating schedules is necessary, I think it misses out on “the good stuff”.  Until recently, I wasn’t aware that I’d become like my neighbor ladies.  Upon reflection, I’m afraid I’ve slipped into the mom mode of talking about surface stuff.

I want to really know what my kids are thinking and how my husband is feeling.  I like to share stories and dreams.  I want to hear about wishes and fears.  But those things take time to share.  There has to be a level of trust and time to let the conversation flow. 

From now on, I’m going to be more intentional with the conversations I have with my loved ones.  I’m going build, not just maintain, my relationships.

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Games for Educators Review of Penny Stones

Games for Educators newsletter reviewed Penny Stones today.  Here’s an excerpt:

It was delightful for all of us to get to know one another better. One student remarked,

I have known my friend since kindergarten, but I never knew that she. . .

We loved getting to know others and at the same time telling about ourselves.  It was fun for us to discuss topics that maybe we would have not imagined without the aid of the category, such as naming a superpower one would like to possess.  We agreed that Penny Stones is fun and is a great tool to use at the beginning of the school year or for any icebreaker activities.

Click here for the full review: http://www.g4ed.com/index.php/game-reviews/307-penny-stones-a-game-of-conversation

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Be True to Your Word

Sometimes I think I really blow it as a mom.  And today was one of those days.  I had to go into Cleveland and pick up 150 Penny Stones.  My kids came home from school as I was packing them to be shipped to customers.  I had promised them that I would be done with Penny Stones when they got off the bus but I’ve been working more days than not recently. 

My daughter asked me if we could get our gear ready for our Girl Scout camp out this weekend.  I said “Of course! As soon as I finish this I can work with you on that.”  So she patiently waited as I stuffed and taped and labeled. 

Because my son’s basketball practice time was changed, we had to leave earlier than planned.  And I couldn’t help my daughter.  The look in her eyes let me know I REALLY disappointed her.  How is it that I can renig on promises I’ve made to my kids, something I would not do to a friend?

I love my kids more than anything but I don’t think my actions have spoken those words to them today.  Tomorrow I’m going to be at the bus stop and the computer will be off. 

I’m thankful tomorrow’s always a new day.

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Thanksgiving Tree

Thanksgiving Tree on November 12, 2009

Thanksgiving Tree on November 12, 2009

To help us remember what we’re thankful for, my husband and I started making a Thanksgiving tree on our refrigerator when we were newlyweds.  It’s become a wonderful tradition over the years.  I always enjoy seeing what friends and family are thankful for during the month of November.

To make the Thanksgiving Tree, we cut the tree trunk and limbs out of paper grocery bags and cut the leaves out of construction paper.  We keep the leaves and markers in a basket on the counter.  We each try to write at least one a day.  And we invite any visitors to write one too. 

On Veterans Day, my father and and old friend came to visit and they added to the tree.  Then it was my turn to watch the other leaders’ children during the Girls Scout meeting.  Each of the siblings made three or four leaves.  So in less than a week it’s already looking pretty full!  I’ll post a picture from Thanksgiving to show the tree in all its Thanksgiving glory.

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Penny Stones Love School Counselors!

Penny Stones in the Journeys of Life Booth

Penny Stones in the Journeys of Life Booth

I had the pleasure of going to the All Ohio Counselors Conference in Columbus, Ohio on November 5.  It was my first counselors’ conference.  Penny Stones were on a table in the Journeys of Life booth and I was the “celebrity inventor”. 

The response of counselors to Penny Stones was amazing.  Never have I had so many people look at Penny Stones and ”get it” instantly.  Counsleors would walk by the table, see the Penny Stones, read the questions, and say things like “I love this!” , “How cool!”  or “What a great idea!”  I sold out on the first day! 

I’ve been to many trade shows.  And counselors, as a group, are the nicest and most friendly customers I have ever met.  Not only were they supportive of Penny Stones, but they were very supportive of me as a woman owning my own business.  I can’t wait for the next conference!

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Penny Stones Panel of Experts

I have seen my childrens’ conversation skills improve as we’ve played with Penny Stones around the dinner table.  But that’s hardly enough proof to claim that they improve conversation skills.  So I’m  creating a Penny Stones Panel of Experts in order to determine if Penny Stones improve childrens’ conversation skills and help them become more comfortable starting a conversation. 

I am hoping school counselors around the country will help me with this study.  Many Ohio school counselors have already agreed to help.  Participants will also be able to help me determine my next themed editions of Penny Stones for topics such as divorce, grief and feelings.

If you’re a school counselor and are interested in being on the Penny Stones Panel of Experts, please reply to this post or contact me via email, tammy@pennystones.com.  Thanks!

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Penny Stones Make International Press

Exciting news!! Penny Stones have made it into an international publication – Nikkei, a Japanese business publication.  You can see it here, http://www.nikkeibp.co.jp/article/column/20091104/193362/?P=1

One thing the reporter asked was if Penny Stones could be used for students learning English – what a great idea!  How did I not think of that before?!

Unfortunately, I can’t read Japanese.  But the Google translator tool works quite well – handy fellows, those Google guys! ;)

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Penny Stones as Table Topics

I was so excited when my Google Web Alert had Penny Stones listed for Toastmasters International today. 

When I was researching for keywords for my website, I came across the Toastmasters site.  I’ve been to a few meetings over the years and couldn’t believe I never thought of them before!  (Sometimes those rabbit holes actually lead to a destination! :)   When I saw that they had ice breakers for sale for their table topics section of their meetings, I called them to let them know about Penny Stones.  They thought they were great and ultimately ordered 96 sets! 

You just never know what you’re going to find when you start a search on the internet!

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Let’s Talk about Candy… LOTS of Candy

2009 Halloween Candy Cache

Last year, we asked our three kids if they would donate some of their Halloween candy to Operation Gratitude.  This program sends candy to soldiers in places like Iraq.  The soldiers enjoy it themselves and give it to local children to generate goodwill.  We paid them $1 for each pound of candy.  I think they gave about 11 pounds altogether.

This Halloween, they were really focused on out-gathering each other.  They all came home with their pillowcases loaded down.  We talked about Operation Gratitude and two of the three were interested.  I let them know that if they gave all of their candy, except a few pieces, they’d get a bonus dollar.  They were thrilled with their huge cache and weren’t about to give it up too quickly. 

Sunday we brought up the topic of candy after lunch.  We asked the kids what they thought of it:  it’s yummy, it gives them energy, they like it, it’s fun to eat for breakfast, it’s sweet.  We shared our opinion:  while it’s all of those things, it’s also bad for their teeth, when their body is processing sugar (takes about one hour to process one tablespoon of sugar, according to a dietician friend), it can’t do anything else.  If they have a cold, their body processes the sugar and then fights the cold, so they stay sick longer.  And we talked a little about diabetes and how lots of  people in America have diabetes today who weren’t born with it.  We asked them why they think we’d like them to give away their candy.  They said because we love them.

Ultimately, all three decided to give all of their candy and kept their favorite five pieces.  We paid $25 for 22 pounds of candy!  The bonus dollar ended up being enough motivation to go from “most” to “all” of their candy.

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Talking to Teens

These tips for talking to teens are from come from The Partnership, http://www.timetotalk.org/

 Start Early
“If you’re thoughtful and open and expressive, and you’ve developed good communication with your kids all along, it’s going to be an easier ride.” 
— Neil I. Bernstein, Ph.D., adolescent psychologist and author

Talk Daily
Make time to talk with your teen every day, so it becomes routine. That way when you have an important topic to discuss, it will be more comfortable and flow more naturally. Chat it up regularly — about celebrities, classmates, the news or anything to help maintain open lines of communication.

Become Digitally Savvy
Bone up on the latest technology online social networks like Facebook and MySpace and status update services like Twitter and you’ll gain a better understanding of your teen’s world. Texting your teen is a great non-confrontational way to check in, show your support and stay connected.

 

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Benefits of Family Dinners

Family Dinner

One of the best traditions families can establish is to sit down and eat dinner together.  Families, especially kids, benefit enormously from frequent positive family meals:

  1. Improves family communication
  2. Improves nutrition and eating habits
  3. Improves literacy development among preschoolers
  4. Develops a protective factor for adolescents against tobacco, alcohol, drugs and low grade point averages
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Comfortable Friendship

“Friendship is the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person having neither to weigh thoughts or measure words.”  George Eliot

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Success and Friendship

“Anybody can sympathize with the sufferings of a friend, but it requires a very fine nature to sympathize with a friend’s success.”- Oscar Wilde

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Approaches to Resolving Conflict

Argument to Beethoven\’s 5th

Conflicts are a part of life that many people would rather avoid.  And I always found this odd.  Maybe it’s because my family never shied away from conflict.  We addressed problems right away and head-on.  I learned how to deal with conflicts in a way that was emotionally safe.  I learned the value of listening to another’s perspective and working through differences.   After a conflict, I would sometimes feel closer to the person because we came together, worked through the issue, addressed hurt feelings and let each other know how much we care. 

As I’ve gotten older and been exposed to other ways of handling conflict, I’ve come to realize that people approach conflicts with different objectives.  The two primary goals I’ve experienced are to put the relationship first or to put being ”right” first.

Being Right
When a person has a conflict and they want to be seen as “right”, or the “winner”, they can often win the battle but lose the war.  Being right and/or placing blame seems to be more important than resolving the conflict.  While it may be unintentional, this approach communicates to the other party that the issue, or their pride, is more important than the relationship.  Ultimately, this approach breaks  trust.  Apologies and humility are generally not a part of this approach.  The hurt feelings stay hurt and often resentment builds up.  After this type of conflict, the relationship usually becomes weaker.  The parties learn it’s not safe to bring up a conflict.  Offenses remain unspoken.  And when they finally are spoken, a flood of emotion can erupt. 

Relationship
In this approach, the person values the relationship more than the issue.  Each side listens to the other and usually tries to make sure they understand what the other is trying to say.  Often, they both apologize because feelings on both sides are often hurt.  Being ”right” is secondary to making sure the relationship is back on solid ground.   This approach usually builds trust.  The relationship often becomes stronger after this type of conflict because the parties know it’s safe to bring up a problem or conflict and they feel valued.  Eruptions usually don’t take place because conflicts are dealt with right away.      

The next time you have a conflict, try to figure out what you want your objective to be before approaching the other person.  In general, I try to reconcile rather than resolve my conflicts (reconcile:  focus on the relationship,  resolution:  focus on the problem).  It’s helped me to keep the relationships with my loved ones to be strong, open, healthy and loving.

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When Daddy’s Away

My family was just highlighted on NPR in a segment focusing on how families are dealing with the economy.  You can listen to it here.  My husband works in Washington D.C during the week and comes home to a suburb of Cleveland, Ohio on the weekends.  It’s a one-year contract with the VA.

We’re thankful he has a job and we’ve created different ways to stay connected while we’re apart.  Here are some:

  • “Look What I Did This Week” bag – filled with pictures and papers that come home from school
  • Tuck-in Routine – Every night, I would sing them their song and Daddy would say prayers.  This hasn’t changed.  Each child talks to Daddy on the phone and lets him know the happenings of their day, and then they pray.
  • Texts – Daddy sends texts and the kids have become comfortable sending Daddy messages.
  • Pictures – We send photo messages as well as videos when speical occasions come up that Daddy has to miss.

It’s not easy and there have been a few times when I REALLY wished he was home, but overall, his job is a blessing.  It has allowed us to stay in our home and not have to change our lifestyle too much.  But we’re all looking forward to February, 2010, when his contract is up and he’ll (hopefully) find a job in Cleveland.  If you know of anyone looking for a great Senior Project Manager in the Cleveland market, please let me know!

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Talk to Your Kids

As parents, we want to prepare our kids for the challenges they will face.  But it’s not always easy to know just what to say.  Some topics are more difficult to discuss than others.  The website Talk with Your Kids is dedicated to helping parents talk to their kids”…before everyone else does”.

Here are 10 tips for talking with kids about tough issues.  Click here for the whole article.

1. Start Early
2. Initiate Conversations With Your Child
3. …Even about Sex and Relationships
4. Create an Open Environment
5. Communicate your values
6. Listen to Your Child
7. Try to be Honest
8. Be Patient
9. Use Everyday Opportunities to Talk
10. Talk About it Again. And Again.

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Good Listening Skills

Talking is easy and we often take the skills of conversation for granted.  But what’s involved in being a good listener?  Active listening skills involve:

  • Paying attention without distractions and maintaining eye contact
  • Reflecting what is heard (This involves using similar words to express back to the speaker what was understood about the content of the message.)
  • Showing empathy by identifying with the other’s feelings
  • Listening with an open mind in order to understand another person’s point of view

From the Spring 2009 Penny Stones newsletter

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Conversation Starters Around the Dinner Table

I was clicking around the blog world and happened upon this neat little list of conversation starters in the Dream Dinner Blog

“If your family is like ours, you may work hard to create a family dinner time routine, or other family activity (”forced family fun” as our oldest calls it), and then realize that you are not sure what to talk about.  There are many resources in print and on the internet that have conversation starters for families. 

Here are few:

  • What is one thing you couldn’t live without?
  • What cartoon character would you most like to be?  Why?
  • What is the hardest/best thing about being ___ years old?
  • Describe your all-time best day ever.
  • What would be the worst job/profession to have?
  • What should a parent do when a child doesn’t listen?
  • Where would be the best place in the whole world to take a family vacation?
  • Would you rather dive off a huge cliff, or give a book report in front of the whole school?

 Even if these don’t spark a lengthy conversation, they will at least get the group started.  It is important that each family gets a turn to talk without fear of interruption.  Don’t worry if every child isn’t old enough to participate.  The language stimulation for the little ones will be wonderful!  Don’t forget to have the adults answer also!  It may be necessary to start a rule that no one is allow to make fun of someone else’s answer.  That way there is a feeling of safety for everyone to speak, whether they are two or fifty two.  You may be surprised by some of the things you hear your children say!” Post from Dream Dinners blog

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Importance of Communicating Well at Home

“Good communication skills and techniques are mostly the result of learned behavior. The examples we are given as children at home, at school and with our friends has a great deal to do with how we develop in this area. Generally, and in simplest terms, the better those around us communicate as we are growing up, the better the skills we develop. Because we have very little control over that when we’re young, we are not all on equal footing starting out. Luckily, it’s never too late to make improvements (nor is it too late to forward this blog to your parents, who might benefit from it as well!).” – from Stephanie Silverman’s Blog, click here to see the whole article.

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Happy Family Day!

Today is a relatively new holiday: Family DayA Day to Eat Dinner with Your ChildrenTM.   It is a national movement to inform parents that the parental engagement fostered during frequent family dinners is an effective tool to help keep America’s kids substance free. Family Day reminds parents that   Dinner Makes A Difference!

It started in 2001 as a grass roots movement and has grown to become a nationwide celebration. In fact, in 2008 President Bush, all 50 Governors and more than 800 Mayors and County Executives proclaimed and supported Family Day!

Plan to spend tonight with your family, eating, talking and connecting around the dinner table.

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But I said…

What percentage do you think the actual words count for in person-to-person communication?
a. about 50%
b. less than 5%
c. about 25%
d. over 75%

The answer is b, less than 5% of a person’s message is the actual words they say. So what makes up over 95%? According to communications research, it’s all the other variables going on around the words, especially the nonverbal communication: how close they stand (proxemics), eye contact, posture, body language, facial expressions, gestures, etc. The nonverbal communication is seen by most people as “more true” than the words.

I’ve explained this to my kids to help them understand that how they say something is often times more important than what they say, i.e. even though they said they were sorry to their sibling, the message they sent was that they were not sorry. Also, when there’s a misunderstanding, we try to ask, “What’s my point?” or “What am I trying to say?” to help insure that the message sent was the message received.

From the Spring 2009 Penny Stones Newsletter

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The Most Annoying, Overused Words in the Workplace

“Could you interface with that team on its ad campaign that’s gone viral, and then circle back with me? If we can leverage similar assets, we’ll have a game changer.”  Ever heard talk like that in your workplace? If it sounds familiar, it could be the buzzwords. “Leverage,” “interface,” and “circle back” are among the most annoying and overused terms in work settings today, according to a new survey of executives. The Buzzword Lineup In research conducted by finance staffing firm Accountemps, 150 senior executives from the nation’s largest companies cited these 10 problem words and phrases (in no particular order):

Leverage: “We should leverage our investment in IT infrastructure across multiple business units to drive profits.”
Reach out: “Jim decided to reach out to this underutilized demographic.”
It is what it is: “The server is down, and clients are irate. It is what it is.”
Viral: “Our training video has gone viral.”
Game changer: “The switch from LAN to WiFi was a game changer for our productivity.”
Disconnect: “There is a disconnect between our customers’ wants and their page views.”
Value-add: “Where’s the value-add in this increase in spending?”
Circle back: “I have to go, but I will circle back with the client later.”
Interface: “My job requires me to interface with all levels of the firm.”
Cutting edge: “Our cutting-edge technology gives us a competitive advantage.”

The buzzwords don’t always annoy listeners in a work setting. Executive coach Liz Bywater, president of Bywater Consulting Group, believes they can serve as a “linguistic shorthand” when used properly and in context. “But using too many buzzwords can lessen an individual’s credibility as an independent, intelligent, creative thinker,” she says. “At worst, it can make him look like a wishy-washy wannabe.” 

Three Guidelines for Usage 
Use buzzwords properly and judiciously. “If the terms don’t add clarity or fail to capture the complexity of a situation, don’t use them,” says Bywater. “Your goal should be to make communication crisp, clear, and meaningful.” 
Consider your audience. Jacqueline Whitmore, a business etiquette expert, says: “Just ask yourself, ‘If I were speaking to an audience of non-native English speakers, would they understand these words?’ This will help you eliminate such phrases from your vocabulary.” 

Check your own understanding.
Ask for clarification or research words you don’t understand, counsels Pat Mayfield, an executive coach and president of Pat Mayfield Consulting. “Some words or phrases have different meanings and implications, so make sure everyone has the same understanding.” She adds: “Avoid ‘tasting shoe leather’ — only use buzzwords that you understand.”
 

During a Job Interview 
Some experts recommend even more caution about using buzzwords in a job interview. (For tips on avoiding buzzwords on your resume, see “10 Boilerplate Phrases That Kill Resumes.”) 
“Every word counts in the interview,” says Andy Denka, executive director of Accountemps. “While buzzwords or jargon can in some instances indicate familiarity with the industry, they also can come across as too cliche and lacking meaning. Unless it’s the absolutely perfect phrase, applicants are better off avoiding buzzwords and instead explaining themselves in more meaningful terms.” 

Whitmore, however, suggests the buzzwords could be a “value-add.” “It seems HR professionals use these phrases all the time,” she says, “and by using them you could be establishing a connection with the person interviewing you.” For real-time tips and job-market news, follow HotJobs_editor on Twitter. This post was written by Tom Musbach, Yahoo! HotJobs

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Don’t Break the Hug

Another tip from Susan Fee - When hugging your child, don’t be the first one to break the hug. They may need a little hug, or they me going through something and need a longer hug at that moment.
By remembering this rule, I’ve been surprised by how short, and how long, some hugs have been with my kids.  And I’m not as quick to step away from my husband now either.  I’ve found myself enjoying those sweet moments just a little more, realizing each hug is for them as well as for myself.  

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How Do You Greet Your Family?

Greet your children and spouse warmly when they come in the door. Let them know how important they are to you. Your reaction affects how they perceive you and your relationship. – Susan Fee, licensed professional counselor, speaker, and author

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Conversations: Introduce a New Topic and Keep It to Three, Initially

A simple guide when talking with friends or family, the Rule of Three is this: When starting a new topic, limit your introduction to three sentences. If your audience is interested, they’ll ask you questions. If not, then move on.

It’s nice to know when your friends are interested, as well as when to move on to the next topic.  And if, like my family growing up, you have a family member who does not limit their sentences, you can always set the buzzer (ours was for 10 minutes and then it was someone else’s turn).
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What Makes the Perfect Hostess Gift?

I was just talking about “the perfect hostess present” with some friends and we ultimately determined that the perfect hostess gift is:
- thoughtful
- generic enough to go in any home but unique enough to be a little different
- attractive
- tasteful
- not too expensive
- easy to keep on hand

As we thought of different gifts we’ve given, we ranked our favorites:
1. Penny Stones – as my friend said, “They really are the perfect hostess present.  And I’m not just saying that!  I love the packaging and they’re more meaningful than something that sits on a shelf, like a candle.  Playing with Penny Stones, you make memories with your friends.”
2. Bottle of red wine (since white wine needs to stay chilled)
3. Candle or Reed Diffuser Sticks - Pumpkin Spice and Pacifica were favorite scents
4. Set of nice, thick note cards – ones we’d like for ourselves
5. Chocolate – is a favorite but doesn’t stay on hand for long!

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Building Strong Conversation Skills

We all talk all the time.  But few of us evaluate how well we converse.  Here are a few guidelines for successful conversation skills.   Before we get to the first one, there’s a basic ground rule: do not text, check messages, etc. during face-to-face conversations.  Give the other person/people your full attention and expect the same from them.  While it is possible to text and talk, it is not polite.  Strong conversation skills are based on mutual respect.  

1.  Try to listen more than you talk.
People want to talk to people who care about their thoughts and opinions.  Make an effort to shift the focus of the conversation to the other person.  (The most popular word used in conversations is “I”.) 

2.  Be aware of your body language.
Look at the other person/people and make eye contact.  When speaking to a child, try to get down on their level.  During a conversation, try to match the other person’s body language by leaning forward when they lean forward, etc.  Attention to small details will give the person you are speaking with a feeling that you truly hear what they are saying and that you are genuinely interested in their opinions.  Many of us do this naturally and don’t even realize it.  (Note: Be subtle.  Don’t do it so much that they feel like you’re a copy cat.) 

3. Pay attention to the tone of your voice.
The tone of your voice plays a major part in communicating effectively.  If your tone suggests a condescending attitude, boredom, or anger, you will lose your audience.  People may no longer want to spend time speaking with you or listening to what you have to say.  They may tune you out.  Using a respectful, friendly tone, will allow you to communicate efficiently and earn you the respect of others. 

4. Ask questions.
In order to move the conversation forward, ask questions to clarify or invite additional information.  Questions indicate that you’re paying attention and you’re interested in the speaker’s views.  Give your full attention to the speaker. When you show others that you want to hear them, they will grant you the same courtesy.

Penny Stones Conversation Starters
With their fun and engaging questions, Penny Stones help people practice conversation skills in a fun and non-threatening way.  Check them out at www.pennystones.com

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